The debate over whether mothers should stay at home to raise their children versus mothers returning to work during their child’s early years is a contentious one to say the least, and there are certainly no easy one-size-fits-all answers.

The pros and cons of being a stay-at-home Mum

As a stay-at-home mum, mother to two girls ages 1 and 2.5 years I often feel a slight twinge of embarrassment when people ask “What do you do?”. And then there is the somewhat demoralising blank space next to “occupation” on forms where I once wrote “Teacher” and now write “Home Duties”. But the thing is I am still an educator, and as many early childhood studies will tell you, the the most important educator in my young children’s lives. Which is why I choose to stay at home for now.

It is not an easy choice for many reasons. Financially our family would be better off if I returned to work. Career-wise I’d be keeping up my skills and gaining increases in salary. On a personal level, I would have time away from my children, which may actually better my mental health.

The pros and cons of being a working Mum

An article in the UK Telegraph by Judith Woods Regrets? Show me the working mother who has none sites research from US universities, which revealed that women who return to work shortly after starting a family have better mental and physical health than those who opt to stay at home. However, it is not an easy choice for most mothers who return to work either. They often feel a sense of guilt putting their child in daycare or leaving them with a nanny. They worry that they are missing out on special moments. Mothers can even be judged and face criticism about their choice to work. This attitude seems unfair when many mothers need to help pay pay the crippling mortgage and keep their place on the career ladder.

What about working from home?

These days there are increasing opportunities to work from home and also part-time roles, which may allow mothers to enjoy greater work-life balances. When I was pregnant with my second child I was lucky enough to obtain an administration job that I could perform at home after my baby was asleep. This allowed me to focus on her during the day and use my brain, while earning an income in the evening. It was a great solution for a while but once I had my baby I had to give it up. The time is approaching where I will have to return to full time work to pay the bills.

We all do what we have to do for our families. As long as we make the time we spend with our children count by being present and engaged, and make time for our own self-care, then we can lead happy, fulfilling lives no matter what we decide to do.